Hello? Are You There?

Okay, so it has been roughly two years since I last posted on this blog, give or take a month or two. But, hey. What's a month or two among friends? So, to get the balg (a new word I have just coined- "blog ball") rolling I am going to follow my husband's lead and write a gratitude list. It is kind of an easy transition back into the world of blogging.

So, on this, the 4th day of January in the two thousand and eleventh year of our Lord (again, give or take a month or two-or decade), I am thankful for the following top ten things.

1) That my good ole dad is still alive and kicking. He has been fighting the good fight since the spring of 2007 and, as far as I am concerned, cancer can keep on sucking it!

2) My daughter. Even though this morning while brushing her teeth she told me, "No! Get away from me, Mama", she still totally rocks my socks off. Even the big heavy socks one wears in the Arctic Circle. She is just that cool.

3) My husband. He puts up with a lot of shit, but he's still here and that's saying something.

4) My mom. I mean, she's taking my NYC in a few weeks to see James Earl Jones and Vanessa Redgrave in Driving Miss Daisy on Broadway. Plus, she cleans the kitchen.

5) My friends. Being in Atlanta rocks the cazbah hard core.

6) Baby monitors. Otherwise how would I be able to surreptitiously hear Katie singing and talking to "her guys" and reading her books pre- and post-sleep.

7) Tequila. No explanation needed.

8) Bradley Cooper. (Hold on. Let me wipe up this spot of drool on my chin.)

9) Endings. As in, my graduate program will be ending in 4 months. I love me some school, but this thing has just been absurd.

10) After Christmas sales. Today I purchased a sweater originally priced $109 for $15. Yeah, you read that right. An 86% markdown.

So, I hope this post has whet your appetite for more scintillating posts. And maybe, just maybe, I will write again before 2012.

February 2009: Thank You in Technicolor

For these things, and so much more, I am thankful:

Damn You, Capt. Sully! Damn You!

Claude, Jacques, and Chicco, who was from down by Detroit, had often seen the lights of NYC. They had smelled (longingly) the aroma of discarded street-vendor pretzels. And, most of all, they had admired the ladies of Central Park, what with their extra-sassy NYC waddles. All of this happened, of course, on their bi-annual sojourns over The Empire State whilst heading in a southerly direction (South Beach here we come!) or in a northerly direction (Chicco always a few feathers less than when he arrived in Florida).

Though the three geese were street wise and tough, they had always taken seriously the stories they heard about "the ones" who simply vanished while flying over New York City. Occasionaly a feather would be found or, God forbid, a piece of webbed foot. Frankly, Claude, Jacques, and Chicco found the stories too frightening to speak of. It was just understood: NYC was a no-fly zone. Sometimes at night, however, Jacques would find himself unable to sleep and his thoughts would wander to that dark place. Where had those geese gone? How could they vanish entirely (or, almost entirely)? It was a mystery Jacques simply could not let go. He needed to know.

Jacques had decided that this was the year he would Goose-up and enter the city that called to him. (Besides, he figured no risk was too great if in allowed him to have even a chance at those CP ladies. He had heard tale of their abilities to...well, we'll save that for another story.) Claude and Chicco were not surprised when Jacques revealed his quest to them. Throughout their time in South Beach Jacques had been quite distracted, lacking his usual interest in recovering fallen churros and pursuing las gansas. Mostly Jacques spent his days walking alone on the beach, revealing nothing to his friends.

Needless to say, it took Jacques a great deal of effort to convince Claude and Chicco to join him in his quest for the truth. In fact, he was only able to persuade them by bribing them with large quanities of Kentucky bluegrass, a delicacy in the goose world. It was a bribe, however, that would go unpaid.

As New Jersey approched the three geese steeled themselves for entering this unknown world, a world full of questions and, possibly, death. Claude and Chicco tried to convince Jacques to let them stop in Central Park first, thinking that, if they died, at least they would have had one night with the ladies of CP. Jacques, however, was adamant. The mystery was to be solved before partaking in any "tourism" activities.

The three geese followed the route of the New Jersey Turnpike, turning east in NYC via the Lincoln Tunnel. As they approached the city they noticed what appeared to be massive white, colorfully adorned birds. The birds were unusual in a number of ways, but especially the noise they made. Jacques, Claude, and Chicco were terrified at first, thinking that they had solved the mystery and their deaths were imminent. However, after flying near several of these beasts of the air, the three were still alive and flying high.

Jacques had heard that a number of the disappearances had happened near the Hudson River. He guided his buddies down to the ground, stopping in Hells Kitchen to ask some rough-looking birds where exactly he should be looking for answers. Information doesn't come easily in Hells Kitchen. Let's just say there were mentions of pate. However, with more than a little cunning and a few evasive maneuvers, the boys were able to get the information they needed. Directions firmly in beak, the geese flew towards the North River Piers.

Sadly, this is where our story must end, as no more information concerning the whereabouts of Jacques, Claude, and Chicco is available. It is this author's hope that the three geese are enjoying themselves somewhere on the Upper East Side, near Central Park.

In an unrelated event, a US Airways flight ditched in the Hudson River the same day the geese were seen in Hells Kitchen. It is likely the birds got an intimate view of the exciting event!

Does This List Sound Familiar?

So, friends (okay, I know that nobody is really reading this anymore, but whatever, it is good for me to make the list), on this, the 2nd day of 2009, I give you my January gratitude list...

I am grateful for/that...

1. My dad, who is the midst of a battle for his life, is fighting with all that he has and, in that fight, he has responded well to his chemotherapy;

2. Katie had a wonderful first Christmas, which included hosting Pops and Deemaw, playing the Baby Jesus at church, and presents, lots of presents;

3. Having my parents here at various times, which allows me to SLEEP;

4. Christmas cards...few things are better to receive in the mailbox (though that Publisher's Clearing House is making it an interesting race);

5. Finding old friends on Facebook;

6. I have been able to nurse Katie for 7 months and think I will able to continue as long as she and I are both willing...this is quite amazing considering how horribly the nursing relationship began;

7. The opportunity for fresh starts that the beginning of a new year brings;

8. The more and more frequent realization that I have control over how I feel-patient or frustrated, controlling or relaxed, irritated or accepting (this doesn't mean I always choose the right one, just that I know that I could...);

9. That I can pretty solidly bank on a snow-free winter; and

10. That the cats have resolved their feline war brought on by an unxpected intruder (or, more precisely, an unxpected intruder's urine) via the Christmas tree.

December's Gratitude List

So, I know that I intended to write these on the first of every month and today is the 8th, but, hey, I figure it is never too late to be thankful. Also, I feel I must address the glaring absence of posts between last month's list and this one's. Most of my attention is going to the writing of Katie's blog and, thus, there are fewer posts here. (Those of you who I want to have that address, have it. If you don't and you want it, e-mail me or respond and I'll see if you made the cut.)

So, quickly while the girl naps, here is this month's list:

1. My husband, who has got to be one of the kindest people on the planet. This morning he saw a cat get hit by a car and stopped to see if he could do something to save the cat. He couldn't so he took great care to move the cat's body and find the home to whom she belonged so he could inform the family. Please note, it wasn't he who hit the cat, he merely observed it. That's a good person, my friends!

2. Katie...not much needs to follow this. She is, simply put, a rock star. What a gift God has given us in her. But, should you want to catch a glimpse into her greatness, I offer you this: The other night she slept from 6pm to 8:45am...and this is only a little longer than her usual night's rest. Again, I say, ROCK STAR!

3. My dad, who though facing what is probably terminal cancer, keeps up the good fight and continues to find joy in life and give joy to my life. A person could not have a better father. You're a bug-catching, balloon-volleyball-paying all-star.

4. The rest of my family, especially my mom, who support me and encourage me and make me laugh.

5. Georgia. My God, it is good to be here.

6. Owning a home...no doubt, it has it's downside, but when I unpacked this time, I knew this stuff was staying here a while. And, it was staying in closets that were mine!!!! Hooray!

7. Barack Obama becoming our next president. Thank you, American voters, thank you!

8. Christmas shopping...I think I truly do find more joy in figuring out what to give to the people I love than I do getting stuff-which says a lot, 'cause I really like getting stuff!

9. Cool/cold weather! I am so glad fall is here and winter is in sight. I hate being hot and it is nice to be out their raking MY leaves on MY yard in the cool, crisp air.

10. Christmas music...I love it, love it, love it!

November's Gratitude List

After a few months off the blog radar, I return (a few days late) with this month's gratitude list. Without further ado, the things I am grateful for this month are

1) My family, especially my beautiful baby girl, Katie;

2) The really fun scrapbooking workshop I just attended;

3) That it looks like the people of the United States will elect an African-American for president, and, a person who might be able to correct the horrors that Bush has brought about;

4) That I am FINALLY a homeowner...hooray;

5) All the support my parents and my minister gave me during the first weeks of Katie's life, when I was struggling with post-partum depression;

6) The wonderful folks of PHPC, who have made Andy, Katie and me feel so welcome;

7) To be back in a town where we have some wonderful friends to do fun things with;

8) Harper and Dylan, who have hung in there with all the transition in their little feline lives;

9) The Daily Show; and

10) Laughter.

Suck It, Orthodontist

So, as you may know, I have braces. I have had them since January of 2007. I hate them. I hate the fact that I am 30-years old and sleep with a bag of mini rubber bands on my bedside table. I hate the fact that I am paying $5000 to having something done that my parents paid several thousands of dollars to have done once already. I hate the fact that all the family pictures of the first year of Katie's life will feature me with more hardware than your local Home Depot. I hate having lunch with someone and wondering not if I have food stuck in my teeth, but just how noticeable the food stuck in my teeth is.

But what I hate most, as of late, anyway, is the incompetence I encounter at the orthodontist. In Maryland I had a great ortho. He was young, funny, creative in his orthodontic assessments, smart, took time to explain the mechanics of what he was doing, had hired talented assistants, and was not bad looking. I looked forward to going to his office because everyone was so nice and I left feeling like we were making progress.

Then, we moved to Georgia. I was limited in my options as to whom I would choose as my doctor due to the fact that my MD orthodontist had used a new style of braces that most orthodontists aren't familiar with. (Despite being new, they still leave me with the opportunity to be called "metal mouth".) Thus, I am stuck with the doctor I have. The doctor himself is not so bad. I have toenail clippings that have more personality than he does, but he does seem to know what he is doing and that is more important than his ability to entertain me. However, the hygienist I have been assigned to over these last few months, frankly, SUCKS! I have had three regular appointments. For two of them I have had to go back for "emergency" care. Now, none of it was a particularly big deal, but when I am paying someone that much money, they should know what the hell they are doing. At my most recent visit, the woman replace the old wire with a new wire, adjusted it and we were good to go...when I pointed out to her that she had failed to put a necessary coil back on. Thus, we had to start all over. Why do I know this woman's job better than she does?

Perhaps this is a minor thing to gripe about. However, scheduling appointments requires a little more forethought and planning than it previously did. And if every time I go to the orthodontist ends up creating another appointment that we have to schedule, and one that has to happen immediately because something is poking me or falling off, then it makes life more complicated than it needs to be.

So, on Monday I go back to have something fixed that the woman didn't do correctly this past Monday. I have asked for another hygienist....surely that can't all be that incompetent!